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Study of Text, C 15: VII. The Needless Sacrifice, P 5. 3-30-18

VII. The Needless Sacrifice, P 5
5 It is this chain that binds the Son of God to guilt, and it is this chain the Holy Spirit would remove from his holy mind. For the chain of savagery belongs not around the chosen host of God, who cannot make himself host to the ego. In the name of his release, and in the Name of Him Who would release him, let us look more closely at the relationships the ego contrives, and let the Holy Spirit judge them truly. For it is certain that if you will look at them, you will offer them gladly to Him. What He can make of them you do not know, but you will become willing to find out, if you are willing first to perceive what you have made of them.

Journal

All relationships are special until we look at them and decide that we want the holy relationship instead. We have no idea how to do this or even what it looks like once accomplished, but if we are willing to find out, it will be done for us. It seems to take some time and some effort on our part; at least that has been my experience.

Our part is to first look honestly at the relationship in its present state. What is the relationship for? So many times when I have looked into my own mind in complete honesty, I have seen that the relationship was a way to get what I thought I did not have. There was no way this could end well unless I let that neediness go to the light, which is our other part of shifting the relationship.

I used to be so proud of my children’s accomplishments. I am sure I bored everyone to tears as I extolled on their virtues. I thought this meant I loved them, but I finally understood that I was using them to prove what I didn’t really believe, that I must be a good mother since they turned out so well. I did not get in touch with the actual love until I saw what I was doing and allowed the Holy Spirit to heal the mind of my need. Then I was free to simply love them without these conditions.

As I look back at all the relationships I have had in my life, I see that they were all special and they all filled some perceived need I imagined I had. It is not pleasant to look like this. I seemed to be a selfish person but I was only a confused and frightened person. As I kept bring these relationships to the Holy Spirit, they began to heal and I am having different experiences.

As the relationships shift, they have a new purpose. Instead of using them to prop up a sagging ego, my relationships are beautiful shared experiences, perhaps not the love that is of God, but a much closer reflection of that love.

© 2018, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Manual for Teachers: 8. HOW CAN PERCEPTION OF ORDER OF DIFFICULTIES BE AVOIDED? P 5. 3-29-18

8. HOW CAN PERCEPTION OF ORDER OF DIFFICULTIES BE AVOIDED? P 5
5 There can be no order of difficulty in healing merely because all sickness is illusion. Is it harder to dispel the belief of the insane in a larger hallucination as opposed to a smaller one? Will he agree more quickly to the unreality of a louder voice he hears than to that of a softer one? Will he dismiss more easily a whispered demand to kill than a shout? And do the number of pitchforks the devils he sees carrying affect their credibility in his perception? His mind has categorized them all as real, and so they are all real to him. When he realizes they are all illusions they will disappear. And so it is with healing. The properties of illusions which seem to make them different are really irrelevant, for their properties are as illusory as they are.

Journal

This makes so much sense. An illusion is an illusion regardless of the form it takes and so healing is simply choosing to disregard the appearance of the illusion and to insist on the truth being made manifest. Maybe, like this: There is no headache, just the appearance of a headache, which I am not interested in. There is only Love and Love doesn’t hurt. Love is joyful and peaceful and that is all that is really going on right now and all I care to have in my awareness.

So if it is so simple and so easy, why does healing often feel so hard? Why is pain so persistent? I have let go of the belief in a number of different pains and after I worked my way through the first one, just being vigilant and persistent in what I knew must be true, the rest have been a lot easier. But, sometimes, I can’t do it. Why is that?

Jesus assures us that the illusion is the effect of a belief and one hallucination is as easy to deny as the next. What is the problem, then? I know it is not that I still believe that I “catch” sickness or I react to my environment in painful ways, or even that my DNA caused it. My mind just doesn’t go there anymore, not with any degree of conviction, anyway. I know that the only thing that can cause sickness are my beliefs. So, just change my beliefs, right? Easy-peasy!

Only sometimes it is not so easy. One thing I noticed is that I do believe that some hallucinations are harder to dispel or maybe it is just that I still identify with the body to such a degree that I can’t quite believe that the pain is not there, that the pain is actually in my mind as a belief in pain. For instance, I can almost always dismiss headaches and small burns and cuts. The pain fades and the injury heals easily. But when the pain is severe, I become afraid and my fear drives me rather than my holy mind.

Another thing I notice is that sometimes I still value the sickness. I think the sickness has something to offer me. It provides me with proof that I am loved and cared for as my family expresses sympathy and offers to help. I have had to discuss this ridiculous notion with the Holy Spirit more than once, along with the idea that being sick is the only way to get any rest, another value sickness holds. When I catch myself doing these things, I laugh it off and get on with things.

A harder one to catch though is the belief I am guilty and guilt calls for punishment. Simply put, I might still believe that sickness and pain can act as self-inflicted punishment that wards off even harsher punishment from God. Could I still believe that?? Surely, not. But, I think that unconsciously, I use pain and sickness as a defense against God. It keeps the story going and my personal self will intact. Sigh.

Nothing is happening with this story and this body right now, nothing at all. It is just an ancient memory playing over and over in my mind. There is no sickness or pain-filled body. There is just the memory of one. What I can do and what I am supposed to do is to recognize that this is true. I am remembering something that only appeared to happen eons ago.

Now, I can stop participating in this seemingly endless groundhog day by refusing to believe in it. When I have the opportunity to choose to believe in the sickness or the pain, I turn from the illusion and ask the Holy Spirit to heal my mind of all these forms of sick thinking, and, very likely, the body will follow suit. Even if it doesn’t, I am lessening the burden of the belief in sickness from the collective mind every time I make that decision.

© 2018, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Manual for Teachers: 8. HOW CAN PERCEPTION OF ORDER OF DIFFICULTIES BE AVOIDED? P4. 3-28-18

8. HOW CAN PERCEPTION OF ORDER OF DIFFICULTIES BE AVOIDED? P 4
4 It is in the sorting out and categorizing activities of the mind that errors in perception enter. And it is here correction must be made. The mind classifies what the body’s eyes bring to it according to its preconceived values, judging where each sense datum fits best. What basis could be faultier than this? Unrecognized by itself, it has itself asked to be given what will fit into these categories. And having done so, it concludes that the categories must be true. On this the judgment of all differences rests, because it is on this that judgments of the world depend. Can this confused and senseless “reasoning” be depended on for anything?

Journal
It is so easy to fall into the ego’s trap of categorizing and sorting. I have a tendency toward the left in my politics. I have all sorts of reasons for this choice and even try to justify it through my spiritual beliefs. The problem with sorting ideas in this way is that in doing so I do not allow the Holy Spirit to guide me in this area. I think I know what is in my best interests when I go to the polls to vote, or when I encourage others to see it my way.

Another thing that happens is that I tend to think in terms of them and us when it comes to politics. This will reinforce the separation idea and make it stronger in the mind. If the difference in opinion is strong as it has been lately, I find myself demonizing the other side. I remind myself of one of my favorite and often quoted passages from the Course. I cannot enter the presence of God if I attack His Son. I can’t afford grievances.

Here is what I am discovering as I watch my mind during this political climate. There is still a strong desire in my mind to decide what things mean and what they are for. On the other hand, there is a stronger desire in my mind to stop thinking with the ego mind and to allow the Holy Spirit to inform me.

Another thing that I have discovered is that once I release the need for others to agree with me, and once I let the Holy Spirit correct my thinking, I can look at the issues involved without judging them or the people involved. Without judgment, I can look at the facts of the issues without attachment, so I am no longer outraged and no longer projecting onto others.

I posted an article by NPR reminding us that Russian bots are busy trolling in an effort to influence and create havoc. That is just a fact. What we do with it is up to us. We can buy into that agenda and start obsessively reading posts that we agree with according to our own categorizing. Or we can pass by them without choosing to be emotionally manipulated.

Another thing we can do is to notice how we feel when we see these posts. Does it make us feel angry, outraged even? Do we feel separate from those who designed them? Do they make us feel angry at the “other side”? This is a chance to allow the mind to be corrected, to choose love rather than fear.

Do we feel reluctant to give up our anger or do we justify our right to argue our point? Do we still feel like someone is guilty? Do we feel resistance to the idea of not following the posts we agree with? This is just another opportunity to be healed. All these things we want are just a matter of faulty categorizing and they are costing us our peace of mind. Instead, we can decide that being right is not worth it. We can stop keeping this dark place in our mind away from the Holy Spirit and give it to Him to heal, instead. Then we will be free to follow His guidance instead of being slave to our ego thinking.

I have been doing this work. I still feel like we need to regulate automatic weapons. I still think that arming teachers is not a good idea and escalating in that way could never bring peace and safety. I feel like we would do well to fortify our schools. But what has changed is that I am not angry at those who disagree. I am not emotionally overwrought about this situation. And whatever we do in the world, I think that the only true solution lies in the healing of the mind.

I am focused on healing the mind that believes more killing can stop killing and that peace can be had through anger and projection. I am focused on healing the mind of all grievances and the belief that grievances are salvation. These ideas did not come from the ego and so I know they will heal us and help us to awaken.

Regardless of what is going on in the world, my purpose is clear now. I am to choose between love and fear in every situation and allow the Holy Spirit to do the sorting and categorizing. He has only two categories and they are not right and wrong. He sees only that it is either true or is it false.

For a little while I became inflamed by the situation, then I asked for healing. Now, I feel differently. I am no longer categorizing with the ego and so I have stopped looking for who is right and who is wrong. I will not try to influence the outcome through manipulation of emotions or arguing, but through accepting the Atonement for myself in this situation and thus strengthening the choice for God within the mind. This will lead to the peace of God, which will not be affected by what happens in the world. Once there is enough healing within the mind, the world itself will be at peace and we will experience the real world that is promised us.

© 2018, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Study of Text, C 15: VII. The Needless Sacrifice, P 4. 3-27-18

VII. The Needless Sacrifice, P 4
4 We said before that the ego attempts to maintain and increase guilt, but in such a way that you do not recognize what it would do to you. For it is the ego’s fundamental doctrine that what you do to others you have escaped. The ego wishes no one well. Yet its survival depends on your belief that you are exempt from its evil intentions. It counsels, therefore, that if you are host to it, it will enable you to direct its anger outward, thus protecting you. And thus it embarks on an endless, unrewarding chain of special relationships, forged out of anger and dedicated to but one insane belief; that the more anger you invest outside yourself, the safer you become.

Journal
It is so hard to understand how I could keep falling for this, and yet I do. I see it more quickly now, and I find it easier to let it go, but I still sometimes believe that I can protect myself by projecting my anger onto others. Somehow this still seems like a reliable defense. If I see someone else as the problem, then I think I will feel safe from condemnation, guilt, and responsibility.

This morning as I wrote in my daily lessons journal, I saw how I did this very thing last night. Here is what I wrote.
In the evening I read an article about a politician. He made some remarks that were so blatantly wrong and so foolish that I just couldn’t believe what I had read. I shared it on my Facebook page with the remark, “Did he really just say this??”
Someone commented right away with outrage. I felt uneasy, but still right. People needed to see this, I thought. I went to bed and as I lay there, I could not relax. My mind was brought back to that post every time I tried to fall asleep. Holy Spirit was prompting me to look at this.

What am I doing? Is increasing the divide between people God’s plan for salvation? Is attacking this brother of mine God’s plan for salvation? Is inciting my dear Facebook brother to anger God’s plan for salvation? This turning inward and questioning my thoughts and actions is part of God’s plan for salvation. The ego mind was so sure that I was in the right, but after looking at this with the Holy Spirit, I lost all interest in being right. I removed the post.

That experience is exactly the kind of thing being discussed here in this paragraph. I have fear in my mind about the gun situation here in our country. My daughter is a teacher and I don’t want to see her killed in her classroom someday, nor do I want to see my grandchildren suffer that fate. I don’t want to see anyone’s children die at the hand someone’s rage. And yet, I was inciting rage with my post. How could that possibly help? Adding rage to rage is not going to heal rage in the mind.

And directing my rage and fear outward onto this clueless politician is not going to make me feel any safer. On some level, I know that I am making the problem worse by spreading fear and anger throughout the Sonship. I am making it worse by increasing a sense of separation between us. There is no way I can feel safe doing this. What a terrible plan for salvation! I have a relationship with this politician and the relationship can be loving or it can be hateful, and this is another way of saying it can be special or holy. It is up to me, but if I want a holy relationship, I must withdraw my projections and let them be healed instead of trying to get rid of them by projecting them onto this man.

© 2018, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Manual for Teachers: 8. HOW CAN PERCEPTION OF ORDER OF DIFFICULTIES BE AVOIDED? P 2. 3-26-18

8. HOW CAN PERCEPTION OF ORDER OF DIFFICULTIES BE AVOIDED? P 2
3 Where do all these differences come from? Certainly they seem to be in the world outside. Yet it is surely the mind that judges what the eyes behold. It is the mind that interprets the eyes’ messages and gives them “meaning.” And this meaning does not exist in the world outside at all. What is seen as “reality” is simply what the mind prefers. Its hierarchy of values is projected outward, and it sends the body’s eyes to find it. The body’s eyes will never see except through differences. Yet it is not the messages they bring on which perception rests. Only the mind evaluates their messages, and so only the mind is responsible for seeing. It alone decides whether what is seen is real or illusory, desirable or undesirable, pleasurable or painful.

Journal
As my eyes show me the world, I see nothing but differences. For instance, people are different colors. But what does that mean? It could mean anything or nothing. It could mean that I find it delightful to see these various shades of color, much in the way I love planting different flowers of many colors. Someone else might see different skin tones as threatening, not like them and so that person might be uncomfortable around so much variety. Someone else could have no feelings about it at all.

What it means is up to the one looking. We decide with our mind what it means and then the world seems to show it to us according to our desire. I think it would be a very distressing way to live if I felt threatened by everything that wasn’t like me. I also think that I would find the proof I was looking for if I believed that people of different color or cultures or countries were threatening. I would find that proof, not because it was inherently true, but because I put it there.

I put it there with my beliefs. The eyes don’t really see at all, they simply report to us what we want to be there. Things in the world do not have meaning except as we give it meaning. Our mind evaluates and the message and so only the mind is responsible for seeing. I can change my mind about what I want to see and I will start seeing differently. I wonder what it would be like to see through the eyes of Christ, to see what is truly there. Of course, the eyes can’t show me this, but my mind can.

© 2018, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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Manual for Teachers: 8. HOW CAN PERCEPTION OF ORDER OF DIFFICULTIES BE AVOIDED? P 2. 3-22-18

8. HOW CAN PERCEPTION OF ORDER OF DIFFICULTIES BE AVOIDED? P 2
2 Illusions are always illusions of differences. How could it be otherwise? By definition, an illusion is an attempt to make something real that is regarded as of major importance, but is recognized as being untrue. The mind therefore seeks to make it true out of its intensity of desire to have it for itself. Illusions are travesties of creation; attempts to bring truth to lies. Finding truth unacceptable, the mind revolts against truth and gives itself an illusion of victory. Finding health a burden, it retreats into feverish dreams. And in these dreams the mind is separate, different from other minds, with different interests of its own, and able to gratify its needs at the expense of others.

Journal
“The mind therefore seeks to make it true out of its intensity of desire to have it for itself.”

What do I want that is so intensely desired that an entire world was imagined to satisfy this desire? It seems that the wish was for a separate self, independent of God and my brothers. So what do I gain for efforts? I get to be different and special. I get needs that must be met and I get to decide how to do that, all by myself.

I have been watching TV lately. I acquired an Amazon Fire Stick, which gives me a lot more options of the types of shows I can watch. What I have noticed is that I like mysteries. I like them in my books as well. I like to unravel or even watch the mystery unravel.

It occurs to me that this mirrors part of the appeal of the world we made. It is filled with mysteries I get to unravel, some as simple as deciding on the brand of toothpaste is best and as urgent as deciding how to deal with a serious problem. In fact, the world presents me with an unending stream of problems for me to solve.

Sometimes I am the hero and sometimes I am the failure. But it is always me, alone, independently making decisions. I have treasured that independence, that separate, special self.
What I have discovered is that it is all a farce. I have never been separate and never been independent. There is no world in which I play out this fantasy. There is only an imagined world seeming to appear in the gap I pretend exists between all things. And even that was dreamed up long ago and is only an ancient memory.

This world of separation was a thought in the mind that existed hardly an instant. I pretend to bring it to life by remembering it and I fool myself into believing I am living in it, all so that I can act as if I am a separate self, making plans and deciding on my own and making things happen. What a goof I am. I used to think this was my superpower. Now I think my superpower is my ability to awaken from this soured dream of separation.

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Study of Text, C 15: VII. The Needless Sacrifice, P 3. 3-21-18

VII. The Needless Sacrifice, P 3
3 The sick attraction of guilt must be recognized for what it is. For having been made real to you, it is essential to look at it clearly, and by withdrawing your investment in it, to learn to let it go. No one would choose to let go what he believes has value. Yet the attraction of guilt has value to you only because you have not looked at what it is, and have judged it completely in the dark. As we bring it to light, your only question will be why it was you ever wanted it. You have nothing to lose by looking open-eyed, for ugliness such as this belongs not in your holy mind. This host of God can have no real investment here.

Journal
Because guilt as a tool to control relationships is so common and so automatic, we must learn to recognize it and to recognize that guilt is not part of love and has no value. Looking at the part guilt plays in relationships, the first thing I notice is that guilt always stems from fear. Without fear, guilt would no longer have any value and thus would not be part of our thought system.

I thought about the use of guilt in the parent/child relationship. I wonder if any parent has avoided this behavior altogether. My parents certainly used guilt and used it frequently. They were afraid for me and so used guilt to control my behavior. They were afraid they would let something happen to me and this fear was very strong so it seemed to justify guilt as a parenting tool. They never considered this an error, and in fact, I expect they thought it was good parenting, certainly necessary.

When my kids were young, I did the same thing. Even after I became a student of the Course and was learning to recognize guilt in all its forms, I still fell back into the habit at times. At other times, the use of guilt became subtler and not as easy to see. Guilt has been a hard habit to break. I see that I still believe in it because I catch myself making guilty or feeling guilty. It astounds me, really, that I have such an attachment to it.

I have stopped trying to reason with myself about making myself guilty and making others guilty and then trying not to feel guilty or see the other as guilty. I simply accept that it is harming me and that I want to let it go. I know that guilt is not part of God and therefore it is not real. If I believe I am guilty, then I must believe I am not part of God. I know that I am part of God and so I must not be guilty.

In fact, if God is not guilt, then He did not extend guilt as part of creation, so guilt must not be real. It must be something I made up, perhaps an unintended consequence of choosing to experience something unlike God. Since it is unreal, I don’t have to believe in it. I can change my mind about anything I made simply because the power that made it is still in me. I have the power to undo what I made.

What would happen to my relationships if I no longer had guilt as a tool? I would have to rely on love instead. The ego mind is so attached to guilt that it has stopped believing in the power of love. This is why I have found it necessary to let go of guilt slowly. For instance, I used to use guilt in the way my parents did.

My child would do something wrong and in my fear, I would try to stop this behavior by making the child feel bad about what they did. At first, I had no other tool and so it seemed reasonable. But later as I began to let go of guilt, I felt helpless without it. I had to learn to trust my Inner Guide to show me how to use love instead.

Here is an example. My granddaughter was watching TV while I did some work in the other room. I went into the kitchen for something and saw that she had just poured the cleaner for my glasses out. I asked her why on earth she would do that, and she didn’t seem to have an answer. I asked her how she expected me to clean my glasses now.

That statement was an effort on my part to get her not to do this kind of thing by making her feel guilty for doing it. Jeez. I walked away for a moment allowing my mind to clear, and to allow Spirit to send me guidance. When I came back into the room, I noticed that she had been watching a YouTube of someone her age making concoctions and immediately realized that it had been the source of inspiration for dumping the eyeglass cleaner. She was about to give it a try for herself.

I said, “Oh, I see why you are doing this. It makes sense now.” She was clearly relieved that I understood. I then told her that I could see why it would seem interesting to try it herself but she would have to resist the urge, and next time she would need to talk to me about it first to see what was acceptable. This was the way to use love to handle the situation and it felt so much better than using guilt.

The more often I have done this, the easier and more natural it has become. My goal is to move from disrupting guilt one situation at a time to giving up the belief in guilt altogether. I am getting closer to my goal and I am grateful for the Inner Guide that helps me to recognize the use of guilt and that shows me how love is a better option.

© 2018, Pathways of Light. https://www.pathwaysoflight.org
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